008.

I wonder if people look at me differently after I disclose to them what I have experienced. 

Let me rephrase that. 

I fear that people will look at my different after I disclose to them what I have experienced. 

I told one of my very best friends.
In fact, I told him before I told a single member of my family. And he started pulling back until he stopped responding.

I fear it has made me not want to let that one person in, and I mean truly in. To know me as close as any person can know someone. 

I want that person who will sit with me and stay as I utter each and every word ofy truth and still see me as me after I finish. Who still sees the amazing woman I have become. Who will still see the strength, wisdom, and beauty I can add to this world. 

I want that person who will sit with me through it all and not see me as fragile, weak, and damaged. 

I want that person who knows and acknowledges that I am not what has happened to me, but so much fucking more. 

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005.

To: F.L.